It was January 12, 2012. The day was like any other day at the office. Lots to do, great co-workers, and a high stress level. I knew that stress was going to be cranked up a few notches with the departure of one of my employees who was being laid off. I had been working on transitioning those clients to my book, and introducing myself as their new contact. I still felt very unprepared and was worried about what lie ahead. I started with this company in July of the same year, and had learned much about the payroll/ benefits world. Nothing I had experienced in my life could prepare me for what would happen later that afternoon.
We had been losing a lot of clients with nothing of significance coming in to replace them. I was told this was normal in this industry, and not to worry. Just before Christmas, I had to sit in on one of the hardest things ever, informing someone that they were out of a job. The timing was bad, and I just felt sick to my stomach about it. I had the distinct feeling that I wasn't meant to be the one that delivered that kind of bad news to anyone. In the past I have had management positions and had no problem with motivating and helping those I worked with. When we walked out of that meeting, I had a strong impression to go with that person into another room and chat. As soon as the door closed, all I could say was "I'm sorry" and offered a hug. I fought to hold back the tears. In the weeks that followed that news, I lost sleep and felt as if I had betrayed my friend. Maybe that was my fatal flaw, that I became friends with her and thus, had that emotional connection.
As her last day approached, my stress kept increasing. Something felt amiss with the whole situation. I didn't know why or what it meant, but it didn't sit well with me. On the night of January 11th while serving at the church I told a neighbor about my feelings. "I've never been laid off, but for some reason maybe I'm meant to go through that experience." It was foreshadowing for the very next day.
The first half of the day went like it usually did. Our HR Manager had the day off (he's a stud by the way) for his brothers wedding. I thought I saw him come into the office, but didn't pay much attention to it. A while after that, my phone rang. "Can you come into the board room?" It seemed an odd request. "I'm in the middle of this payroll, can I finish it up and come in when I'm done?" I asked. I didn't dwell too much on it because I was in the middle of a project, so I forged on with the thought to pop my head in when I was finished. When I completed my task, I walked down the hallway to the board room. The door was locked, so I knocked. The door opened just enough for me to see our HR Manager, and another of my co-workers sitting at the table with a couple of papers. "Can you give us a couple of minutes?" I said yes and returned to my desk. That's when the wheels started turning. I said a little prayer asking for help to accept whatever it was and to have a clear and calm mind. I was soon called back into the board room; with a deep breath I walked back down the hall.
The mood wasn't sad, but it definitely wasn't cheerful. The situation: We had lost too many clients and needed to cut back to a skeleton crew in order to recoup losses. The news: I, along with 5 other co-workers were being laid off and our last day would be the next day, the 13th. I sat there for a few seconds, and all I could feel was relief. Why relief? I have no idea. I wasn't surprised by it at all, and in some way, I had been prepared for it emotionally. I thought to myself, "this is how it feels to be fired."; but I was not upset or freaking out wondering what I was going to do. I gave our HR and Operations Managers a handshake and a hug and went back to my desk. By then, a few others had been informed, and we started discussing it. I was most worried about calling my sweet wife and breaking the news to her. I waited until I got home to tell her because I wanted it to be a face to face conversation. Unsurprisingly to me, she was understanding, supportive, and sweet. She didn't get upset, cry, or freak out wondering how we were going to feed 3 kids, pay our mortgage and other obligations, and wondering what I was going to do for a job. I've said it once, I'll say it again, I totally hit the jackpot with Liselle!
The decision on what I was going to do for work was almost instant. The result of getting hired turned out to be a saga that lasted 6 and a half months. During that time, we witnessed many of the tender mercies that came to us. My unemployment was only $300 a week. That took care of our mortgage, car payment, and utilities for the most part. How we were able to eat, stay warm, and enjoy a few nice things here and there, I have no other explanation than divine intervention. We were privileged to receive help from our Bishop a couple of times, and have a greater testimony of the welfare programs of the church. We had some good friends on our street have us over for dinner a couple of times, times where we wondered what we should do for dinner. Our family was so supportive and helpful. Whether it was paying me for odd jobs here and there, or giving us some food or groceries, they were received gratefully. We didn't totally burn through our savings, and I never felt worried about money. I struggled a bit with not feeling valuable. I played the mind games anyone who goes through a layoff plays. "If I were any good at what I did, I wouldn't have been laid off." and, "If only I stayed at Job A, I would have avoided this whole thing." Nevertheless, I was able to overcome those quickly and stay positive. That's one of my best talents I think, positivity.
Through the trial, I now appreciate my new job more than anything. I have always wanted to help people and families. This job allows me to do it every day, and I must say, I'm good at it. To be able to make a living helping people plan for, and protect their family and assets is such a rewarding thing! I've rambled on for a while now, and could go a while longer, but I'll spare you... for now. All I can say is... What a difference a year makes!
