Making a Choice... Sort Of

Our life has been a whirlwind of craziness over the past month. I have been working a lot of hours, meeting with many people, helping them find what matters to them and implementing a plan. If we haven't had a conversation about what I do for people, we really do need to sit and visit. I'm busy, and have a lot of demand, but I'm never too busy. I've had several nights recently where I get home just as the kids are getting in bed, or even after they've been asleep for a bit. I've had a little bit of a reprieve this week, and it's great to spend time with my little family. On top of the craziness of work, we have been pondering what the next move for our family will be in regards to the garbage going on with our home. Through a couple of awesome experiences we have made a decision... Sort of.

Two weeks ago, after an amazing General Conference weekend, Liselle and I felt the need to really sit and discuss what we were going to do with our home. I had felt strongly that it was time to make a decision, petition the Lord for confirmation, and move forward. This whole process has been a real mental/ emotional roller coaster. It's now been 7 years since we moved into the Balmoral neighborhood. I feel we were brought there by our Heavenly Father to help us grow, learn, and to be trained for things in the future. When we were in the process of finding a place, we bid on one home, but were outbid by a ridiculously small amount. We missed out on a couple of others, one was even destroyed by a huge fire. Eventually we found our current home. We got in just as the housing bubble was expanding, and saw many amazing people move in. It truly was a little piece of heaven for us. Through great neighbors, an amazing ward, and the positions I have held in the ward, I got to know so many amazing families. In our 7 years, I've been able to serve in our ward as 1st and 2nd counselor in the Elders Quorum, Executive Secretary, Elders Quorum President, 1st and 2nd counselor in the Bishopric, and currently as Ward Mission Leader. I've sat in many living rooms with these amazing people, and truly love them all. We thought that we would never leave because we love the people so much that it would be impossible to let them go.

The weekend of the 13th and 14th, Liselle and I decided to attend our ward temple night, and to go with a purpose in our hearts. We had decided that we were going to move out of our home, and wanted to know if that was the right thing to do. As we walked inside those hallowed walls, I felt peace and calm. After handing my recommend to the man at the desk, he greeted me with a simple, "Brother Fitzgerald, welcome to the house of the Lord." As soon as he said that, I felt the warm fuzzies all over my body, and even got teared up a bit. Through the entire session, I felt so at peace with everything. With work, with things at home, with my marriage, with my relationships with those I love and care deeply about. Most of all, I was finally at peace with the idea of leaving our beloved ward and neighbors. After talking with my sweet Liselle, she had the same feelings. We also used the next day, which happened to be fast Sunday, to focus on that answer, and ask for guidance on which avenue to take in leaving. That's where the 'sort of' above comes from. We are moving soon, that decision is made. We just don't know which way we are leaving yet; walking away (strategic default), or patching things up a bit and renting.

Throughout this whole process we have been supported by so many people. Our families have been great in helping us find resources and professionals to talk things over with. Our friends and neighbors have expressed concern and support for us in trying to make sense of everything. We've had several chats (in person and on Face Book), emails, texts and phone calls asking us how things are holding up. There have been ups and downs as we learn of each lead that takes us towards another dead end. There have been worries of our house just tipping over with a stiff breeze, snow and rain pouring in through the cracks, freezing winds blowing in to our rooms, rodents walking in through the wide open cracks, and many other crazy possibilities. I'm not sure how we held it together this long and never really freaked out, but I know that our support group has been a huge contributor. To all who fall into that category, thank you so very much.

With us leaving and starting a new chapter in our lives, we will miss many people. Some we may never see in person again, only through social media. Others will continue to be the same friends they have been through our time here in Balmoral. Regardless, know that you have been an influence for good in my life, and I will look to your examples always as ones of strength and service. If we never got along well, you still have had a positive effect on my life, because that's how I choose to see it. If I've ever hurt your feelings, or done something stupid, please forgive me. Above all, I hope that I have been half as good to you as you all have been to me, and that if you hear my name years from now it brings good feelings and memories.

Man, you'd think I was dying or something! Life is great, live yours in a way that matches the greatness you possess!